Curious about male orgasm?
An orgasm is one of the most powerful driving forces for men. It is stimulating, pleasurable, offers a release of tension and plain healthy. And, the whole process, is a little more straightforward than for a woman.
It has been suggested that a male orgasm is most similar to the clitoral orgasm in women. It builds from arousal and tension gradually, is very focused in the genital region, it lasts a few seconds and releases tension, and makes one feel woozy and satiated. It also requires some time to afterward (refractory period) to gain arousal (and erection) again.
There tend to be four distinct phases of male orgasm.
This is a phase of arousal (and stimulation) can not be underestimated for sexual pleasure. And the arousal occurs both psychological and physically, which work together to bring an erection. Arousal builds through the build-up of erotic tension, that comes from erotic thoughts, sights and sensations, depending on what he has eroticisized as sexual.
Arousal leads to sperm moving from the testes, passing the seminal vesicles, picking up fluids (seminal and prostatic), and getting in position (at the back of the urethra) to be ready to be ejected out of the urethra.
Triggering of ejaculation.
The brain sends a message to the penis that “it is time, ” and the body starts the ejaculation process. This is also called the “point of no return,” because it is very difficult to stop an orgasm (or ejaculation) once it starts.
After ejaculation there is a period where the penis (testes, etc) needs a rest before they can start the process again, known as the “refractory period.” An average refractory period is approximately 20 – 30 min. It varies with age, mood, stress level and health, and lengthening with age.
Male Orgasm: What it feels like
The male orgasm is much more visually obvious than a woman’s orgasm, and as a result, has been easier to study and, therefore, studied far more rigorously than female orgasm.
However, surprisingly little has been done to explain the “feeling” of a man’s orgasm. The description of male orgasm is often put as “a pleasurable tension that is localized in the groin, that gets warmer and more urgent, building to a point of “no return” and finally reaching a peak of extreme pleasure.” Within the moment just before, and during, a male orgasm is what is called a “little death,” or point of a short loss of consciousness or awareness to the outside world. The pleasure or male orgasm lasts a few seconds (or longer with training) and ends with a feeling of tension release and satiation.
Multiple Orgasms for Men
When we think of multiple orgasms, we tend to think of women. But men can experience multiple orgasms too.
The key to multiple orgasms in men is “dry ejaculation” or “dry orgasm.” This is when a man feels the pleasure of orgasm, but does not ejaculate. The semen stays inside the bladder. In this way the body is not signalled to go into “rest”, but instead stay aroused (and erect).
Toys to Help Get a Man Off
There are many wonderful toys to help your man to the bliss of orgasm.
Tips on How to Give a Man an Orgasm
This might seem like it is too easy of a solution, but it works! He is the authority of his own body. Ask him how he most reliably reaches orgasm and specify that you are asking for “when there is someone there.” What works for him on his own versus with a partner present can be quite different.
Ask him to touch himself in your presence. As he builds to orgasm, pay attention to what he does:
- Does he move up and down with his whole hand or is it only his finger tips?
- Does he use a lot of pressure or lightly stroke it?
- Does he change position slightly or hold his breathe?
- Does he start describing a particular fantasy?
If you discover what triggers his orgasm you can use this to help him along to orgasm at any time.
Explore, experiment and play!
With the vagina:
The porn star, Jenna Jameson, in her biography gave women the advice to tilt their pelvis down during vaginal intercourse if she wants a man to orgasm more quickly.
With a toy:
More tips and toys for male orgasm